There was once a time when I was helping my sister plan a group Zoom call for some friends. I was eagerly suggesting that she think of some games for us to play with them, explaining that I thought a bit of structure would prevent the call from becoming one where we all just awkwardly stare at each other. “Of course,” I joked, “I wouldn’t mind sitting and staring at other people. I’m just afraid other people would get bored.” It’s true. One of my favorite pastimes, as I have emphasized in a previous post, is, well, watching people and observing people. So what exactly do I find so engrossing about this activity?

It Appeals to My Eye for Detail

One way in which me and my sister are distinctly different is that she is drawn to the abstract while I am drawn to the concrete. It is in all seriousness (and humility) that I state that I absorb the information I can take in with my five senses at a remarkable rate. I enjoy detail and noticing the little things, which I can afterwards construct into a larger and logical picture. What “little things” am I referring to? There are myriads of details that one can observe in a single person. Using my eyes, I can study the way a person holds their head, walks, and makes facial expressions. Body language is fascinating, and watching how it differs from person to person is even more fascinating. In one situation involving a dozen or so people, for instance, Person A sits with her arms crossed across her chest, always hugging an object towards her body, whether it be a bag, a paper, or a water bottle. Person B, on the other hand, always sits with her legs criss-cross-applesauce, or in some other casual fashion. Person C, for some strange reason, always sits with his legs crossed (which, according to my mother, is terrible for his back). Not that I think that there is some incredibly nuanced psychological meaning behind the way that a person is sitting. I simply think that it is interesting that different people have unique habits down to the way that they sit. The other major way I use my senses to observe other people’s habits is by listening, naturally. I love to listen to other people. I love to remember every single word they say and I love to treasure conversations and save them for re-remembering later. Occasionally I will lie awake in the middle of the night and suddenly remember something someone said to me seven years ago. It is strange and random, but it is also very fun. Being able to absorb details and miniscule things is a form of entertainment to me.

It Appeals to My Intellect

Another one of my favorite pastimes is watching documentaries. We can see the glory of God through his creation, and we can be awed and wonderstruck by watching and learning about his creation. His creation includes humans, who, being made in His image, are complex and intriguing, even more so than the comical penguins that I learn about through BBC documentaries. I enjoy learning new things and being in awe of creation, and learning about people and getting to know them gives me sheer delight. I also really appreciate the uniqueness of every person’s personality. In today’s day and age, the world has seen the rise of personality tests (the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, the Enneagram) that attempt to sort the eight billion people on this earth into a dozen or so categories. While these tests can be entertaining and occasionally accurate, I find that they do possess quite a bit of presumptuousness. There is just no way for every single personality on earth to be classified into one of sixteen or one of nine types. Humans are too nuanced and too complicated, and I have a deep love for the many layers that each person I have met has and for the endless well of surprising knowledge that is a person’s mind, speech, interests, tendencies, and personality.

I Enjoy People

Spending time with people is a source of joy to me. One might think that, based on the way I have been previously describing them, I view people as projects, experiments, or objects. On the contrary, I try excruciatingly hard to look for things to enjoy in people. After all, people can also be a source of pain for some, and finding genuine delight in others can often be difficult. Through journaling, I have discovered that articulating my thoughts about other people on paper causes me to ponder what I truly feel and think about them. I am often shocked at my own capacity to dislike other people and yes, sometimes even to resent other people, but I have learned (and am still learning) to think about the true, the honorable, the just, the pure, the lovely, the commendable, the excellent, and the praiseworthy in others, as commanded in Philippians 4. I admit that occasionally I will scream internally, “______ is awful! If I were to write something nice about ______, it would be complete, unacceptable dishonesty.” God gives mercy, though. He opens my eyes and allows me to see the true and honorable in others, whether it be through an experience, my aforementioned eyes and ears, or through someone else’s eyes or ears. The ability to have a strong sense of appreciation for others is a blessing from Him, and not by any means my own charitable heart. (Indeed, left on my own I would most likely hate everyone. Most people aren’t intensely likable. They all are, after all, sinners.) This ability and this appreciation allows me to stand in awe of God’s glory, and it is something that I continue to pray for every single day. I continue to write about, discover, and explore this broad and deep ocean of knowledge of other people, and it enriches my life. People are like books—not books that I can read and understand completely (for to do so would be beyond arrogant), but books that are complex, surprising, and that sometimes open up and read themselves to me, which is always a delightful pleasure for me.